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Museumghostlight wrote
on September 4th, 2009 at 08:22 pm
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I received a song in my mail from Heather. Nothing else, just a nude mp3 looking at me expectantly. After having listened, once, I began my work. I am a problem-solver and as communication this had a meaning to discover. I slept on it, listened again, then went to work [the paying kind].
In terms of music I am more esoterically inclined than Heather. I will listen to three minutes of trash if during part of it there's a particularly clever or intriguing interplay of sounds contained within; or, just for the memories it evokes. She prefers things that sound aesthetically pleasing the whole way through. I view the vocals as more than simply another instrument only in that the sounds they make are particularly recognisable from everyday experience. She can't listen to anything with vocals that make no sense - while I am happy to wallow in Paramore's evocation of hard-rock and rich vocals, Heather's basically allergic to it almost entirely because the song-writing is so densely self-indulgent(referencing) that what meaning escapes it surely only does so incidentally.
So, we have premises; that I, as a a consumer of music have no taste beyond what I personally find delectable which is, itself, a capricious hunger - and that she is quite discerning. Our quarry is lyrical.

Directly after the opening we find a repeated chorus of goodbyes. This, for me, was the bulk of it and then the mind turned to why we should receive another, redundant, goodbye that was made malicious by its nudity and delivery. After a day or so of pondering this question, I set about to cast the inquiry elsewhere and moved to resolve the breathless mumblings in the back of the chorus. A lyric sheet proved that the song's story was not one of there-and-back-again-thank-god love that it seemed, but one of fond yearning after a goodbye said at the start of the story told. ┬┐Did she want me to call her? Surely she would've just said so, not encoded it in a song that was apparently pregnant with representation.
A few hours later I picked up the phone and hung up when it began to ring. I don't want to talk to her. I talked to her last week, all smiles and tomato wishes, and then something she said wrong made my day unravel; made the next a pile of threads. I kept on talking to her, biting down my agony, because she wanted to keep talking but I wanted to curl up in a warm place and try to force the pain out of my face. I didn't want that to happen again, so I didn't ring her.

The truth is that this song isn't a goodbye or a hello. It's an odd piece of synchronicity that has no intention beyond its gross mimicry. It's something we can share over something we used to share. And rivers won't slake a thirst for rain.

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turkeyphant : ip theft but a tune anyway
      [27.02.4.9.09]
It's something we can share over something we used to share.

This.
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ghostlight
      [43.10.4.9.09]
I wonder how my little Brits are going.
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turkeyphant
      [49.10.4.9.09]
We've all grown up. I hung out with amoe recently - a bunch of us drove to Berlin.
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agentvaughan
      [23.05.4.9.09]
Are you trying to maintain some relationship with Heather? Like at least a friendship?
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ghostlight
      [40.10.4.9.09]
Ostensibly.
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agentvaughan
      [04.10.6.9.09]
What I meant was is it what you want or is it something you're doing because you're bummed out over the split.
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ghostlight
      [40.05.7.9.09]
Regardless of the split we were very good friends and I enjoyed hanging out with her.
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steelcaver
      [13.07.3.10.09]
A recent thread we were bantering in was frozen by the author. I was going to reply, but that appears to be delayed indefinitely...

... and, at any rate, your replies seemed to indicate some confusion about which side of the US border I live on. Please have a look at my location on my profile, just so we're clear about which country I call my home and native land.
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fireuzer110
      [14.03.20.10.09]
don't worry, someday someone will love you
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ghostlight
      [03.06.20.10.09]
I don't believe this to be axiomatic and you will have to support it with proof.
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fireuzer110
      [46.12.6.11.09]
it's based on the looseness with which i use the term 'someday'

if you stick a bunch of monkeys into a room, they'll eventually evolve into typewriters

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